I had a melt down Sunday over my computer. So my desktop is my world to use to cope and escape, so the fact that is messed up pretty bad, kinda bummed me out real bad. I had panic attacks and all that. I fixed it real good this time, so it's booting up like it should and it's doing it faster than the last time i fixed it. It was a software issue, so those are difficult to diagnose or get around, though they're slowly getting easier to fix the more Microsoft comes out with new versions of windows. Seems to be working real well, now and it was a lot easier to get back on track since i have it backed up in two different ways. I don't take chances with this stuff. I back up EVERYTHING!
Really, though with all the anxiety of "what if it happens again?" or "what if i didn't really fix it?" the come as kind of unfounded, because after having decided to take a few days away from the gaming rig of mine, I relaxed a little more and only used it to charge and sync my iphone. The anxiety gets to be too much and it's just not enough to take a Xanax XR and stuff lately with some added anxiety that I'm still not sure what the precise source is, because it's subconscious.
I really need to relax a bit. Maybe I can't play games on it for a few months till I have money to fix it, if it actually came to that, but the fact that all my stuff is backed up doubly, just means that getting things back to normal is that much easier. I mean I can't rationalize all these fears and meltdowns I have had. I don't know how to calm myself. But every now and then for some reason I can take a look at the situation rationally and take it in reasonably can sometimes be a comfort. I honestly take too many problems and blow them out of proportion.
So if anyone can help me figure this out or tell me how they deal with it, I'd appreciate it. It takes a toll on the body and it saps my energy for a couple days.
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