Thursday, February 23, 2012

Starting a Small Self-employed Business

So I've started plans on building my own computers and selling them on eBay.  Well, that's been changing.  I need to contact Social Security on how to go about this.  I know that they will accommodate you in some ways. My plans have stopped about eBay and gone to a more local idea.  I may put an ad in places, so if anyone close to me wants a computer custom built by me, I can offer them one built with quality parts like Asus, XFX, Samsung, or MSI, as opposed to some of the cheap parts they use in Dells or other such places where they use cheap motherboards or video cards.  The motherboards and power supplies seem to be where they go cheap and fail on customers.  Not to say that some of mine won't fail, but chances will be lower and they will work more effectively and efficiently.  The parts that fail can easily be replaced at almost zero cost to me, because of the warranties on them.

Anyways there will be a seminar where I plan to ask some questions on how to get started.  I need to understand tax laws, resources, and software available to me and how to use it for my business.  Also business licenses.  I don't know if I'll manage to make a living on this alone.  In fact it's probably likely that I'll still need SSD in addition.

But this is more a passion project than a way to make money.  Money is sort of secondary to this.  I love putting these things together and touching the components.

Thursday, February 16, 2012

Because I Care!

This is a little more for non-aspies than it is for you aspies out there, but please read and pass this along to anyone that is NT, such as your friends and family who don't understand autism.  Another note is that I may actually get a little angry in this post or rather post about times where I was angry.

Anyways, for the longest I can remember I've always hated confrontation.  I hated it with a passion.  I can't deal with it even now.  When more than one person in my vicinity, even if I swear to God that I hate their guts, if I hear people getting real loud and riled up about something.  I either bottle it up and let loose later or I try to bottle it up, but then explode when it gets to be too much.  In High School, I was called psycho for my emotional outburst or rage attacks, usually that's because I was being picked on, but that's another story all together.  There were times when I would defend a friend or even if the two weren't even close to me I'd just blatantly shout "SHUT THE F*** UP!"  I've been known to do this defending a friend who was picked on to which a bully would say it's none of my business and to this day I want to say "Like he** it ain't!  This is my friend!  Show some f***ing respect!"

I've wanted to hit a bully and there were a couple instances where I have.  I care that they be right.  And now I wish I could tell them that I wanted to hit them, because I cared a great deal about them.  They may think I hate them.  I may even think I hate my enemies.  But I've wanted to hit them and show them and scream at them about how wrong they were simply because I actually give a crap about them.  I actually have the shred of decency to love them.  I don't care what others think just for me, but for their own sake.  It's not just because I felt weak against their hate (admittedly that was some of it).  It's because I cared enough to teach them what I truly believed.

So, yeah, I can not handle people being mean.  I can't handle people fighting, even if both of them are wrong. I can't stand it!  Right now, we have a male cat in the house that hasn't been fixed yet and he's a big bully.  I hear him attacking mainly a certain one and that one that he goes after is the most vocal of all.  You hear "REOW" and a hiss or two and some tumbling and that throws my anxiety all helter skelter.  I just want to pop some Xanax pills and just mellow, but I'm more likely to forget my pills, so don't worry.  I'm not the type to get addicted.  I'm just saying that's how I feel.

I could make a list of what upsets me, but there is one other thing that gets me that shows how much I actually care about people in general.  I hate haters.  I hate hypocrites.  And I hate backwards thinkers.  These people are trying to pull back progress that our world is making towards tolerance and love.  We are becoming a more well balanced society by being more understanding or accepting of people.  Just think, a long time ago it would have been unimaginable to have a black president.  We are allowing gays to get married.  The list goes on.  And even though it's inevitable that this change continues and that love will be bigger someday, there are still those monsters that want them all to die or to change, when you know darn well they can't.

So when someone asks me "Why do you care?" to my face when I get into a rage attack from all the stimulation confrontations cause even though I'm not even a part of it, I can only tell them it's because I love every cell in everyone's insignificant little bodies.  Yes, I care!  I either don't show it or I have a funny way of doing it, but I care very much.  Yes, I keep to myself.  Yes I like to spend time alone more than be with people.  I love "people time."  Even an aspergian like me needs time with people.  But I actually care a lot more than what I am comfortable showing.  It's a messy feeling.

Aspies aren't very comfortable showing affection necessarily and, like me, many are not comfortable to say that they care or show it.  It's all an over stimulation thing, but we care.  We care a great deal and this story only proves it and if not to you, but to me it certainly does.

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

So, What Do You Want To See In The Next "Assassin's Creed" game?

I received a survey from one of those typical "do this survey and get money" type things I'm signed up for.  Those services aren't much, but when you want some extra cash on hand and you don't make much, it can be worth my spare time.  Anyways, I got this survey and they asked the typical questions, this one being about video games.  It went on about asking if you've heard of certain titles and whether you have or enjoy them and I got to the point where they started asking specifically about "Assassin's Creed:  Revelations."  Of course I gave all my opinions on it.

But here's where it get's interesting.  They gave this list, and to choose three, of what world eras and locations people would like to explore in the next game.  Here's the list:

Assassin’s Creed survey lists possible settings for future titles

Of course I chose Feudal Japan as my high interest.  Victorian England was another.  I can't remember what my third one was, but rest assured it seems Ubisoft is making another "Assassin's Creed" game that I'm sure I'll buy.  It looks to me that it would be in early development and not coming out this year.  Maybe next year?

Anyway, if it ends up being Feudal Japan could there be ninjas?  Would that change some of the play mechanics?  Weapons would no doubt be different.  You'd need to be in the dark a good part of the time instead of out in the open, just hiding among the people.

So what do you think should be in the next Assassin's Creed game?

Friday, February 3, 2012

Behind Your Back

One thing that perplexes me a little bit about the behavior of Neurotypicals is their ability to be totally different people from one moment to the next.  I've seen people act real pleasant and nice to someone and then, the next day gripe about them in such a way that they don't even want them around.

Ok, so you're really nice to this person and you talk to them and exchange a lot of pleasant words to them, but you secretly hate their guts?  If it were me and I didn't like the person, I'd probably either avoid them or talk like I was in a hurry and didn't really want their company at the moment.  I wouldn't just be so sweet and nice and chipper.  I'd be indifferent.  And If disliked them bad enough, I'd be honest with them and that I didn't want to talk to them and then just tell them to back off and just avoid them.  I don't know.  I just don't see the point in pretending, not that I can.  If I don't like you, then you're going to know it.  If I'm neutral, you may not know anything.  But I'm simply observing people blatantly acting the opposite of how they feel about someone towards that person.

And then there are people that talk about you behind your back.  I honestly don't know what people say behind my back and I'm pretty sure I like it that way, but somehow people talk and say bad things about another person behind their back.  It's kind of cool by me that if you don't like someone, you can say it to someone else.  And if you're going to say something about someone, it should at least be confirmed truth.  I'd much prefer to say "This is what I'm hearing, but don't take it as truth," but we all know where that will go anyway, so might as well not even do that much.  I pretty much avoid saying to someone, "Oh, this person said that about you."  This is actually something I've done before when I didn't know any better.  Say like I'm trying to be like everyone else.  Well, I don't do that now and you end up being the one yelled at anyway, so might as well just "zip it."  Anyways, I hear person A talk to person B about person C and then another day person C might talk trash about person A, also with Person C and person C won't be neutral when discussing it.  It's sort of like "I know!" and then go on to say something else about A or C.  I've personally been talked to about someone I know that I get along with.  I don't just go "I know it!" and then say something I don't like about the person.  I simply nod like "Yeah, whatever."  I shrug it off like I don't care or I'm not really listening.

I see the middle person getting into more trouble when they indulging the other person that's talking about someone behind their back.  I mean, you kind of get to the point where you run the risk of being the friend of neither one.  That's how I see it.  But these two things are what I see NTs doing that I don't fully understand.  Especially the first one.  I guess since aspies are generally authentic, they don't have to pretend they like someone real well.  They either put up with them and don't say a word or they are consistent enough to avoid the person or shrug them off when being talked to by them, while complaining to someone else about them.  We don't really try to wear a mask and play make believe.  It's a hard social game that we can't invest our energy in.